What Do You Think of My Short Story?
Expanding on the existing article, "I really enjoyed this story, and it drew me in quickly. I would like to have seen the suspense about Andrea drawn out a bit more and more character development of Jon. You described his feelings and thoughts well but what does he look like? All that is needed is a bit of polishing, taking care of typos, and you will have a great short story."
Joy to you,
Maralee Fox-Heins
When reading this story, I was immediately captivated and drawn in by the intriguing plot and well-developed characters. However, I couldn't help but feel that the suspense surrounding Andrea could have been drawn out a bit more, keeping the readers on the edge of their seats. Adding more details and clues about her mysterious background and motivations would have heightened the suspense even further, leaving readers eagerly wanting to know more.
In addition, while the characterization of Jon was well done in terms of his internal thoughts and emotions, it would have been helpful to have a clearer description of his physical appearance. Providing details about his height, build, hair color, and any distinguishing features can help readers visualize him more vividly and connect with the character on a deeper level.
Furthermore, a bit of polishing is needed in terms of proofreading and correcting any typos or grammatical errors. These small errors can distract readers and take away from the overall impact of the story. Taking the time to carefully review and edit the story will ensure a more polished and professional final product.
Overall, with a bit of careful attention and refinement, this story has the potential to be a compelling and engaging read. The suspense can be heightened, the characters further developed, and the writing perfected through thorough editing. With these adjustments, this short story has the potential to truly shine.
Joy to you,
Maralee Fox-Heins
